Just a Dream
by Uchihaflower14
Summary: If I am a dream, then I am a dream who loves you with all of his heart. If I am dream, then I am a dream who wishes he had never left you. If I am a dream then I am a dream whose heart shall break everytime you wake for the time I have lost with you.
1. Recurrence

Just a dream- A Naruto Fanfic by:

Uchiha flower14

Sobs shook Sakura's frail form as her head shook in disbelief. Was she going crazy? Seeing things was not normal, was it? Was it an apparition or had her dreams from eight years ago really become possible? She had given up hope of this moment long ago. Did she still want it? A moment ago things had been so different. She was happily reading her favorite book, as she sat on the familiar stone bench near the gate of Konoha. The sky was a radiant blue and just being under it gave one a feeling of pure ecstasy. Suddenly the book was wrenched from her hands. She didn't need to look to tell that it was Naruto. She sighed heavily." I was enjoying that story, Naruto." (She was trying to quit slugging him after every little thing he did that annoyed her)

" It's not Naruto," said a strangely familiar, strangely unemotional voice.

" Ino," she said hopefully, although she knew perfectly well by then that it wasn't her bossy blonde-haired friend. She slowly looked up into the face that long ago she had made the mistake to think she knew better than anyone. The face that she had tried to understand so many times but always had been shunned away. The face belonging to the person who she cared about more than herself. The face that, after she had poured out her heart to him, had stamped on it and left it bleeding on the ground. She couldn't bear to go through all of that pain again, no, not when she had just truly recovered from it, when the pain had gone away enough so that she could genuinely smile when she was with Naruto and Hinata, when she could finally bring herself to laugh at Ino's jokes, and when she was finally strong enough to train with Tenten again. Why did he have to turn up now? She curled up in a ball and screamed for Naruto to come, to save her from this pain, to shine his warm understanding smile on the situation.

" Sakura," Sasuke said quietly, for yes indeed it was he.

He had returned to Konoha

" Sakura, are you alright?" Naruto came running dragging his wife, Hinata, by the hand. He froze when he saw Sasuke.

He picked Sakura up easily in his strong arms and stood her on her feet. Hinata slipped her petite hands in to Sakura's, and held her while she cried as she had done so many times before.

"Hinata, take Sakura back to the house." Hinata looked back at her husband. She trusted her husband, but leaving him alone with his archenemy did not bode well. He gazed back as if to say, "Well, are you going to do it?" Finally she complied and pulled Sakura along in the general direction of the house.

"Sakura," she coaxed, " we're having Chakin Sushi tonight. It's your favorite!" Both men watched their retreating figures in silence until they disappeared. Then Naruto spun around.

He growled, " What do you want here, Sasuke?"

"Whatever it is it's definitely not your concern," Sasuke replied coolly.

" Anything that has to do with Konoha is my concern, remember, I'm going to be hokage! Now talk to me!" " It's Sakura I want to see, not you!" There was stunned silence.

"What?" Naruto said in disbelief.

"Let me see her, Dobe."

"Why?" challenged Naruto. Sasuke stared at past Naruto's shoulder in silence. Then he walked past Naruto stirring dust in the air.

Sasuke said exasperatedly, "I don't have to explain myself to you, Dobe." Naruto blocked him with a kunai. "What are you doing, Naruto?" asked Sasuke condescendingly.

Naruto replied, "I'm not going to let you pass until you tell me what you want with Sakura."

Sasuke smirked. "Are you going to fight me, Dobe?"

"If I have to, then I will Sasuke. She's can't take another one of your blows. She all but went crazy when you left. She couldn't cook for herself so I took her in to keep her from starving. She cried every night. She's not even a chuunin yet. Even Hinata's already passed the exam." Naruto said sadly.

Sasuke paused. On one hand, he would love to fight Naruto. On the other hand, he _needed _to talk to Sakura. Each minute passing by made the distance between them seem to grow. Naruto was satisfied to see that Sasuke was momentarily stupefied.

"You need to think about what you've done. All the people you've hurt, Sasuke. Was it really worth it to get your revenge? You saw what you did to Sakura. Is the relief of killing really so much better than the relief of being loved?" Having said these strangely-profound-for-Konoha's-number-one-knucklehead-ninja words, he began walking away. Sasuke's soft words stopped him in his tracks.

"I never wanted to leave. From the moment I turned my back on her I wished that I could apologize, that I could stay, but I couldn't rest until I killed Itachi. I can't tell you how many times I wished there was another way. I thought that, because of my duty, I had to set all my feelings aside and live for my revenge. Every night I thought about coming home, and giving up on Itachi, but every morning I had to put aside my own pain. Sakura, of course, knew me better than anyone. She told me the night I left, that there was another way. She told me I would be happier with her. And to my detriment, I ignored her. Last year, I killed Itachi. But... She was right. It just made me feel... empty. Now, I know that, in truth, all my family would have ever wanted was my happiness, not this quest for death. I need to see her, Naruto."

Naruto turned back to look at him in shock. His disapproving frown softened when he looked at Sasuke's trembling hands. "Sasuke," Sasuke glanced up at Naruto. A single teardrop ran down the avenger's face.

Naruto tried again, "Sasuke, she still loves you. She never stopped loving you. When you left, she was ridden with grief. We all tried so hard to turn her back into the strong, happy person she used to be, and we were almost there, too. I don't know if you realize how rare a smile has become for her. Sometimes she wakes up screaming in her bedroom. You don't know what it's been like." Naruto ran his hand raggedly through his hair, feeling helpless. "Sasuke, you still have a chance. You're just going to have to dig deep into her heart to pull out her love. You already have the key, now all you need to do is earn it." Naruto walked away and he waved behind his shoulder. "You can come tonight. I'll tell Hinata to set an extra place on our table"

Sasuke stayed there for a long time. He couldn't believe that he was finally back at Konoha. How could he have ever left? He slumped in the bench that Sakura had been sitting in. He had made so many mistakes in life and there was no going back to undo them. He sighed; love is literally the slowest form of suicide. He got up slowly, and trudged back to his old house. His fate now rested on the shoulders of a small pink haired kunoichi.


	2. Unbearable

*Disclaimer*- Shoot, I thought I owned Naruto! Guess not. Oh well. :)

If you are reading this, please please please review. It may seem too tiresome to you but it means alot! Seriously, I want to know what you think. If you have reasonable constructive criticism it is appreciated too.

...

When Sasuke walked in, Hinata was laying food out across a magnificent pearl-inlaid dining table. Sushi, steaming rice, wonton soup, fish cakes, and plates of oranges were all arranged neatly. Sasuke leaned in, inhaling deeply. It had long been known to the good citizens of Konoha that Hinata was a phenomenal cook. That was part of the reason everyone tried to stay on good terms with Naruto. (Don't tell Naruto. He thinks he's popular).

Naruto was reading on a gold velvet couch. Looking curiously at the cover, Sasuke discovered that it was a novel on psychology. He almost died right then and there. Naruto reading about psychology? How much had Konoha really changed?

"Did you honestly think everyone would be the same? That they would wait for you to grow up? Wait for your revenge to be over with?" a little voice in his mind nagged him. "You're the only one that _hasn't _changed. You're still the same narcissistic, egotistical, conceited jerk you always were. Even Sakura realizes-"

"Hey, that's quite enough," Sasuke interrupted. "You're insulting yourself when you say stuff like that about me. And why should I care about what Sakura thinks?" he fumed.

"Oh yeah," his mind scoffed, " of course Sakura's opinion of you doesn't matter. You just came into Naruto's house for no reason, dressed up for no reason, brought your _love letters _to her in your bag -"

"Shut up," hissed Sasuke. Naruto looked up, startled. Hinata stopped her work. Their surprised eyes looked back at him. "Sorry," he muttered. Just then Sakura walked in. She was wearing a silver tank top with white jean cut-offs. Her pink hair, slightly damp from a recent shower, was fanned out across her back. When she saw him, her eyes widened. She stopped breathing for a moment before scampering back the way she came, looking strangely like a fawn confronted with a hunter. Hinata sighed and scooped some food onto a grey ceramic plate. This she brought quietly to Sakura's room. She didn't come back.

Naruto laid aside his book. He stood up and sat down at the table. When Sasuke didn't follow, he asked, "What are you waiting for?" Sasuke joined him at the table. They didn't talk. They didn't look at each other. The sole noise in the vacant room was the sound of forks scraping across their plates. At last, Naruto pushed his plate away and stood up. He walked away slowly, leaving Sasuke staring blankly at the table. When he reached the doorway, Naruto turned back. "Sasuke." Sasuke glanced up at him.

Naruto smirked. "What are you waiting for?"

Sasuke cocked an eyebrow. "What are you talking about, Dobe?"

"Go to her, Idiot." Without waiting for Sasuke's reply, he turned back and went to his room. Sasuke smiled to himself.

"Whatever, Dobe," he muttered, but got up all the same. He walked with his hands in his pocket down the hall that Sakura had disappeared. He stopped at a light blue door on the right. Hung on a rusty nail was a sign. Pink cherry blossoms danced lightly across the yellow hued wood. He smirked again. " Guess you haven't fully grown up yet, Sakura." He hesitated, standing before the door. The old brass hinges creaked when he opened it slowly. Hinata was sitting at Sakura's bedside, talking reassuringly to her. Sakura saw him and hid her face behind a satin pillow. Hinata looked up and smiled. She walked past Sasuke. He could have sworn he heard her speak. " Good luck. You'll be good for her. I just know it." But, his mind made mistakes all the time, more increasingly so since he had returned to Konoha. It also didn't help that Hinata was such a quiet speaker in general; you had to be close to actually catch her words. Hinata exited, closing the door behind her. Silence ensued. Sasuke spoke up, "Sakura?" Still silent. He sighed. He knew he really didn't deserve anything different, but he still couldn't help but hope.

"Sakura," he repeated. Even saying her name felt good. He hadn't allowed himself to say it in ages. It was a name that went with happy times and good ages. Oh, he had written it many times, but never said it. If he did, it would intensify the pain. He knew. "Sakura, I don't expect you to warm up to me yet. I know what I put you through. I'm sorry. I don't even expect you to forgive me yet. Just let me talk to you. Give me a chance to talk to you. I want to show you that I have changed." He took her stillness as a cue to go on. " You probably won't believe this, but I love you. I always have. I always will. I love you. I left you because I knew that I wasn't good enough for you. I knew that I didn't deserve to even wipe the ground you stand upon. You're good, Sakura, through and through. I didn't want to taint you.I didn't want to put you in danger for merely for my own desires to be satiated."

Sakura contradicted bitterly from the bed, " Well you're here aren't you? Too bad you can't stick to your own choices."

" I can't live with out you any longer. It's unbearable. I'm tired of trying."

Sakura objected, "If it's so unbearable then how did you last so long?"

"I wrote to you."

"No you didn't!" Her response was immediate. He zipped open his bag. He pulled out a stack of letters two feet tall. She gasped. He smiled sadly. He pulled one from the bottom of the stack. He sat down by her bedside and read to her in his strong sure voice.

"Sakura,

I left you tonight. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I wanted to say that. But I knew that it would only make it harder for us both. Harder for me because I would have run right back into your arms. Harder for you because you would have been broken all the more. I have to let you think that I don't love you. Then maybe you won't love me anymore. You can find someone who's better for you. However painful that idea is to me, I have to do it for you. I don't deserve you. I love you enough to let you go. I love you enough to know where you would be happy. I'll say it again, Sakura. I love you. You are everything to me. I never really understood why you chose me over Naruto. Though he can be obnoxious, he's strong, kind, and loves you as much as I do. Plus he can actually be with you. I had to leave you. I think, deep down, you knew that I wouldn't listen when you begged me to stay. But I hope you also knew that if I could, I would have been with you much earlier than that.

I am sitting in Orochimaru's place right now. Carrying out the steps to my revenge. Living out this awful fate that I have been given. Orochimaru scares me. I don't know if I ever told you how terrified I was when we first met Orochimaru. Do you remember? I do. You were so worried about me when he bit me. All _I_ could think, though, was she's holding me. Sakura's holding me. And I felt safe. You make me feel safe. And loved. And then when you wanted me to quit the exam because you were worried Tch.. You worry too much.

I wish there was something I could do. I wish I had been strong enough to kill my brother so many years ago. Then I would be free of this awful burden. I would be free and I would tell you I loved you. We would be happy, as you told me today. Don't think I don't know that. How happy we would be. It hurts my chest to think of how blissful I would be just to call you mine. If you only knew how much you mean to me... But I wasn't strong enough. I couldn't kill him. I wonder if I can ever be strong enough to kill him. I hate to admit this, even on paper, but Naruto was always destined to be stronger than me. While his life is upheld by the power of love, when I look at my life, all I can see is spite, rivalries, and revenge. Except when I look at you. Thinking of you is what upholds me. When I ask myself what's worth fighting for, you are the only answer that comes to mind. I have to get stronger so that I can kill my brother and come back to you.

I love you Sakura.

Sasuke


	3. Reality?

Sasuke returned the next night. And the next. And the next. And the one after that. And the one after that. Every night he came, he read to her. Every night, she ignored him. Until the seventh night... He was reading to her. She was wearing the black shorts and a lavender tank top. She was shivering. He had tried twice now to get her a blanket. She kept refusing him.

"I like the cold, Sasuke. I think you can understand that. I bore your cold for many nights longer than this." He winced. He had that one coming of course. Somehow, if it made her feel better, though, he would bear one thousand insults from her. He would bear her cross for her. He reached and pulled another letter from the gargantuan stack next to her bed.

"Sakura," he began wearily.

"Sakura,

I'm coming home today. I'm finally going to see you. I wonder how much you've changed. I'm sitting under a Cherry Blossom tree right now. It's raining but the rain can't get through the branches. It reminds me of us. I was the rain. I would shed my drops on you. I would cover you in snow. You bent, but you never broke. Like Naruto, you are upheld by your love for others. But you still loved me. You reveled in my rain and accepted my snow. Now though, I fear that you will have found a sun to replace me. I hope that you will need me anyway. Like flowers always need rain. I'll be anything you need me to be. I'll be content to know that you're happy. Even if it's not me who's making you happy. I'll still remember every moment of us though. If our past is the only thing that cruel fate allows me to have, I will take it gladly. Somehow, the moments when you were with me always seemed to stand out from the rest. I would compare it to sleepwalking through my life. Except when I was with you, you woke me up. You were always the most real thing in my life.

I dreamt of you last night. We were twelve again. You were crying. I tried to get to you, but there was a fence between us. No matter how hard I tried to get over it I couldn't. Then Naruto approached you. He put his arm around you. You looked at him and pulled him closer. I watched while he kissed you. I still couldn't get to you. It was torture of the most excruciating kind.

I pray that you will give me a chance. Give me a chance to love you like I should have all along. Will you chose reality? Or will you turn away and return to your dreams. I wonder...

-Sasuke"

Sasuke got up from the bed. He would go home and dream of her - again. He wished she would hurry up and choose. He didn't want to push her though. He almost closed the door but Sakura's voice stopped him.

"So, you are real, then?" He turned back, astonished that she had spoken. Since that first night, she had said nothing to him. She would merely watch him, as he read her proof of his love.

"What do you mean?" he replied cautiously.

She answered," You're not a dream? And... And you mean what you're saying? When you first showed up, I thought I was dreaming."

"Wouldn't be the first time I dreamt of you," she added bitterly after a moment's thought. He returned to her side, and sat once again by the bed. He grasped her hand firmly and looked deeply into her eyes.

" If I am a dream, then I am a dream who loves you with all of his heart. If I am a dream, than I am a dream who wishes he had never had to leave you. If I am a dream, then I a dream whose heart shall break every time you wake for the time I have lost with you." His arm curled around her, and she nestled her head in his chest.

" If you are a dream," she said, " then I should never want to return to reality."


End file.
